The Antiseptic Baby and the Prophylactic Pup
Were playing in the garden when the Bunny gamboled up;
The hippopotamus is strong
And huge of head and broad of bustle;
The limbs on which he rolls along
Are big with hippopotomuscle.
The planets are bells on his motley,
He fleers at the stars in their state,
He banters the suns burning hotly-
The Jester whose nickname is Fate.
Learn this now before you are older:
Don’t go through life with a chip on your shoulder,
Always aggrieved and ever offended,
Amœbas at the start
Were not complex;
They tore themselves apart
And started Sex.
And Sex has ruled the earth
From then till this,
Because on the branch that is tapping my pane
A sun-wakened leaf-bud, uncurled,
Is bursting its rusty brown sheathing in twain,
I know there is Spring in the world.
The tusks which clashed in mighty brawls
Of mastodons, are billiard balls.
Across the sands of Syria,
Or possibly Algeria,
Or some benighted neighborhood of barrenness and drouth,
There came the Prophet Samu-u-el
HO! Heimdal sounds the Gjallar-horn:
The hosts of Hel rush forth
And Fenris rages redly
The Deer don't dine
When a Wolf's about,
And the Porcupine
Sticks his quill-points out.