A Ridiculous Scavenger Hunt List - Poem by R.K. Cowles
A nudist wearing a derby, lounging about at Christmas on a city's park grass
A man in a tie-dyed business suit rolling in the mud laughing off his ass
A piece of rusted plumbing at the curb with the trash printed in Italic letters 'Made in the USA'
A construction worker with his head out a third story window of a dance studio shouting 'Ole, Ole! ! ! '
An ice sculpture of a pride of lions tiptoeing through tulips, midday in the springtime
Five clowns donned in high heeled leather boots pushing a baby grand over a highways center line
A child under 10 at a curb with covered in temporary tattoos thumbing through an unabridged dictionary
A priest with his buttocks exposed through ripped pant's hind-end, on both sides snickering fairies
A mongoose playing chess with a macaw on a raft with pieces of green and orange on a blue and yellow chess board
A woman dressed as Mrs. Santa Clause with ram horns holding a sign that reads 'Praised the Lord'
A fourth grade class toting a four foot by four foot coffin filled with R. K. Cowles poetry wearing t-shirts printed with 'I'd rather play the Theremin' on it
A living statue of a transvestite dressed in medieval garb grasping a mace and upon her head an over-sized Viking helmet
Someone pissing on the side of a building at noon that isn't drunk, with a t-shirt that has printed on it 'Jesus Saves'
An Asian female with body glitter and a boysenberry lollipop stuck in her mouth, with her head shaved
A matador whacking dust out of a rug with a spade from a fourth story balcony
A wigless cross dresser wearing a jester's hat tap dancing on top of a pink SUV
A nudist in the act of cow tipping wearing on her face a C3PO mask
A kangaroo in diapers guzzling tobacco sauce from a golden flask
A man with turquoise lips doing jumping jacks in a banana outfit next to a marbled sculpture of the Liberty Bell
In the middle of the street a shackled hare, gagged with duct tape chasing a bearded tortoise outside of its shell
A restaurant serving Red Liberty Red Wine at dawn by a waitress reciting poems by Lewis Carroll
Group of elderly disables in a plaid station wagon mooning a young priest exiting a cathedral
Two chimpanzees in tutus hopping on pogo sticks shaped as devil-horned penguins
A pillow fight in a lingerie boutique between a cook and a waiter without their aprons
A band of street performers using bluegrass instruments covering a Cab Calloway tune
A criminal being spanked by his own belt over a lap of a female police officer named June
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