Al E Moaney Poem by Robert Edgar Burns

Al E Moanie came into our town.
He was buying everyone drinks
Spreading lots of cash around!
A ragged woman walked in
From a stage right off the street,
With two little urchins
Who were clinging at her feet.

“Hey, Al E Moanie
What have you to say? ”
Said the woman,
“I hope you are bringing
Me cash today! ”
“Your daughter needs new shoes
Your boy a kerchief for his nose.
And I need all those lady things,
You know just how that goes! ”

AL Moanie turned to look at her
And sniffed air with his nose.
Then squinted with his eyes,
And said the name “Rose? ”
“No, she answered angrily
Throwing a bottle toward his face.
But though he was dead drunk
He was able to duck and say,
“So Rose is your sister? ”
“She had twins just yesterday! ”

“My name is Al E Moanie, ”
I heard him say unto the judge.
“I guess I have two wives right now
And four kids, what can I say? ”
“Your honor if you let me
I’ll became a better man.
And take care of my family
In the best way that I can! ”
Then finally in conclusion
Before being placed into the Sheriff’s car,
He lifted his middle finger
And said “Judge have a cigar! ”