He said; 'If we die,
We'll wake back up tomorrow! '
It was then that I realized—
Each day was a death
And, each night was a brand-new sorrow.
Every time,
I laid my eyes to rest,
I knew that when I awoke—
There would be nothing left.
Life expectancy, as he and I knew it,
Living, as we saw it,
Was over with now
—Even when I clawed at it!
So, I laid my eyes,
Yes, I decided to sleep
I tried to forget life
As, silently, I did weep
My life no longer
Was a game
Nor—was I content
Nor was I pleased or sane.
My skull was sore
As I lay down my head
And closed my eyes once more,
Believing I was better off dead!
My head, it did throb
My throat had a lump
My face was so swollen
My arms had goosebumps!
I wept, and I pleaded;
'God, why aren't you here? '
It was all I wanted and needed,
I no longer held fear.
'Freeze my soul—
PLEASE fill this hole,
I'll deposit my brain;
If you'll make me, once again, sane! '
These words were my prayer
They were my song
They were my battle
My right versus wrong!
I had given up—
I did surrender
Because I just was never—
A very good pretender!
The one who says;
'It'll be just fine! '
I vomited clichés'
I spat on such lines.
I was senseless and foolish
Horrific and demented
I still ignored the rules—
Humanity invented!
Then I sighed a sigh,
of the most content relief.
I no longer had to worry
I no longer held this grief.
Because I gave in;
I was ready to go.
I finished this movie.
I'd completed the show.
So, my hands extended.
My feet, they did walk.
As I left it all then,
I could barely talk.
And the joy it took over,
As I departed.
Peace, I did feel—
As the ending, it started.
© copyright 2008-2024 All but My Pulse (Pt.1 of the Death is Beautiful Quartet)
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem