Coldness Poem by Eman Awad

Some times it gets so cold in the morning,
and even the early mornings aren't beautiful any more.
It's how the coldness comes without warning,
and i feel colder each moment than the moment before.
And at night when i'm wide awake,
i feel like i can't move from my place.
I ask god to have mercy for any sake,
to have mercy on me and my weary face.
Tears freeze me and all around me,
till i can't move at all and still i cry.
Wishing that at a moment i'd be free,
but salvation has gone saying goodbye.
This heart loved deeply, it's true,
yes, i've loved and loved till no love is left.
I sacrifised all i had just for you,
and they say that the goodness of my heart is a gift.
That's what you lost and you'll never regain,
i know this for sure, you'll never find such love.
Some day you'll be lost in your life again,
but i won't be there for you, i've had enough.
You never told me, you never loved me back,
i remember your promises, i had that right.
I had the right to go down that road and never go back,
and you were all mine, just in my own sight.
I know i've hurt so many hearts before,
but i really didn't mean to, is it how you feel for me?
I've had enough, i can't take it any more,
that feeling i've felt for them can't be felt for me.
That's when i feel so cold knowing i've lost all,
seeing you and get torn apart, isn't just it.
It's how i wish to stand after that fall,
though i know i can't and i see you about to forget.
And i see you forgetting and i know you're over me,
getting shattered and i couldn't get my self together.
Then that hard coldness get all over me,
and i lose hope when i feel it'll last till forever.
Forever to me now is not growing older,
with you in so much love and devotion.
It's a constant feeling of getting colder,
like drowning in frozen and a dark ocean.
No wishing comes true upon any star,
not in loving you and not for you being the one i hold.
I've lost hope and it's mercyful that's it's far,
maybe it's a good way to live, growing old, feeling cold..