Cuts - Poem by Kimberly Hope
The sharp blade,
it's sliding across my cool flesh,
warm blood begins to fall from my forearms.
My skin feels so hot, it's almost a burning sensation.
I cut again, again, and again.
Then all I can see is my blood,
flowing out of my arm and dribbling onto the floor.
The blade, cutting into my soft flesh,
over, over, and over again.
Cutting, and cutting, and cutting yet again.
I cut to drawl all of the pain;
the emotional and the physical
to force it all to one place.
In the end,
when the blood has stopped,
stopped running wildly.
The pain is so numb,
like the pill of vicodin, or the leaf of weed.
Feeling high is the mind,
feeling nothing is the body.
I am grateful now;
for I can feel nothing.
My body feels as if it is floating,
walking on the clouds I am.
My mind is clouded by everything,
He appears before me,
tears filling his eyes,
yet he says nothing,
nothing at all.
Looking into my eyes,
he touches me.
I feel relaxed, and nothing more.
He kisses my fleshy bleeding cuts,
and they begin to heal.
He tells me how special I am,
then I fell loved, and capable of pushing forward again.
He kisses my lips,
so passionately yet ever so gently;
and the I feel wanted, by him.
When he backs away,
the pain hits me like a winters wind.
Fiercely, I immediately reach for the blade;
but he grabs my hands,
looking deep into my eyes,
I knew he could see all the pain,
all the pain I'd been trying so hard to hide.
Looking deep into my eyes,
he says with deep love;
You are mine, I am yours, and I shall love thee forever.
He drops my right hand,
and we walk back together, to our oak tree,
we sit and watch the sun go down beneath the wild flowers.
Together we listen to the sounds of nature.
T kisses the healed cuts,
then my lips, once again.
Now I know; that I shall always be loved.
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