Decisions Poem by Alexa Buttner

was it a mistake,
should i cry,
are we done,
is it over.

as tears fill my eyes,
i wonder why,
could it be so difficult,
and to choose a guy.

i sit alone,
and i figured it out,
its time to tell you,
blame it all on me.

i screw up all,
relationships i have,
i won't lie,
i'm a walking war zone.

theres cuts in my wrists,
but only in my dreams,
i can't help but understand,
why i want to scream.

this feeling i have,
i dont know why its there,
im scared to commit,
and its just not fair.

to you or him,
myself or my friends,
its a decision i have to make,
someones heart will have to mend.

i dont want to hurt you,
or make someone cry.
i know how it feels,
like you want to die.