Descent Into Hell Poem by Margaret Alice

Oh, scary thought – ended up on the floor, couldn’t
breathe after two slices of bread and mountains of
croutons, suffering allergy symptoms, the nightmare
repeated: Chemical depression while sinuses and
arteries in my head are constricting, spasms in my
back and neck making lying down
almost impossible

Yet Wurmbrand was able to remain joyous and
positive while suffering torture and deprivation in
prison – why doesn’t religious faith work for me?
When I had hallucinations of a strange presence
strangling me after four years on a wheat diet,
sunk into chronic headache and fatigue; I could
not even pronounce the names of God or Jesus
as I struggled for breath

Yet Wurmbrand prayed right through the night, even
danced before God, then recited sermons in his cell;
I shared a dormitory with twenty people, was kept
under sedation, all my youthful preparation to face
torment came to naught when I succumbed to the
allergy - I admire Christian saints from afar - but
keep on reading various spiritual books; my own
body feels like a worse place

Than human prisons where Wurmbrand was beaten,
locked up in spiked cupboards; God’s presence filled
him while I never experience help when struggling for
breath - it is unfair; I only hope there is a benevolent
godhead because it is such a beautiful thought, I am
thankful that I’m always kept safe whatever happens,
my loved ones are safe also

I trust this denotes Godly care, my belief is based on
admiration for joyful believers who overcame all forms
of persecution; yet I wish I could feel such supernatural
help when I’m suffocating, I’m scared of visiting and
travelling, too much allergy food negates medication,
I’m so alone in the descent into hell…