Dónall Dempsey

Veteran Poet - 1,546 Points (15/07/56 / Curragh Camp, Co. Kildare, Eire.)

Double Dutch - Poem by Dónall Dempsey

Stuck in a Dutch disco
not enjoying myself much

I’m nursing a drink

it looks like
coloured sick
with an umbrella stuck on it.

I take a sip
and wince.

A stunning blonde
wearing a tight fitting tiny tee-shirt
with Rod Stewart emblazoned upon it
eyes me up...stops:

I look up
from my trying not to look
see Rod Stewart grotesquely distorted
by two giant mammary glands
staring at me.

Scary stuff!

“Ahhh wake up Donall
I think that she’s got something to say to you...”

She smiles
(politely)
and asks
(politely)

in perfectly articulated
English
(so I couldn’t fail to understand) :

“Have you got the time? ”

Consulting my watch I tell her
(awed into a hardly audible whisper) :

“It’s half past ten! ”

Her false eyelashes
(she must have inherited from her mother)
don’t even blink.

She asks again.

“No...have you...got the time? ! ”

It’s half past...is she
deaf or wot?

Then it dawns...
(like the theme from 2000 & 1)

she’s asking me
to dance.

We take the floor
attacking the music with our bodies.

Under a glitter ball
light slashes through our bodies
releasing our souls into a new dimension.

Blondie shrieks:
“Ahhhhh...she’s no good….yeah
rip her to shreds! ”

She shrieks
above the music:

“What...is...your name? ”

I scream back:
“Dónall! ”

She shouts: “What? ? ? ? ”

I holler: “Dónall! ! ! ! ! ! ! ”

The music stops.
...as if my voice had stopped it.

My heart stops.

She stops.

She looks at me
in horror:

slaps me
across the face

stomps off

thinks twice about it

comes back

turns to me and slaps
the other cheek

(she must be a Christian or something) .

The visible imprint of her palm
is branded upon my cheek.

It glows in the dark.

Everyone glowers at me
as if I were one sick looking cocktail
with an umbrella on top.

Just then:
“JE T’AMIME”
comes on

and all the couples cuddle
congeal

huddle into a dry hump
hands clenched on rumps.

I stand there
like a prat

(isolated & stunned)

not knowing
where it’s at.

The smoochy couples
leave a space

(around me)

as if I were catching.

Every year
(year after year)

if I should happen to meet
a person
of Dutch origin

I ask them
(taking first a cautionary step back) :

“Please, now
don’t’ take
offence
but what
does Donall
mean in Dutch? ”

I cringe and wince
anticipating the blow.

They stare at me
in horror

and, say:

“Nothing...why? ”

“Oh nothing...that’s ok! ”
I smile.

Both they
& I

thinking now

what

the f**k

was

all that

about then?


Comments about Double Dutch by Dónall Dempsey

There is no comment submitted by members..



Read this poem in other languages

This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.

I would like to translate this poem »

word flags

What do you think this poem is about?



Poem Submitted: Thursday, August 23, 2007

Poem Edited: Thursday, March 31, 2011


Famous Poems

  1. Still I Rise
    Maya Angelou
  2. The Road Not Taken
    Robert Frost
  3. If You Forget Me
    Pablo Neruda
  4. Dreams
    Langston Hughes
  5. Annabel Lee
    Edgar Allan Poe
  6. If
    Rudyard Kipling
  7. Stopping By Woods On A Snowy Evening
    Robert Frost
  8. Do Not Stand At My Grave And Weep
    Mary Elizabeth Frye
  9. I Do Not Love You Except Because I Love You
    Pablo Neruda
  10. Television
    Roald Dahl
[Report Error]