Drowning - Poem by Mona Adviento
Languidly I tarry at the shore of cast-off forever
Holding off the wave that threatens to consume the acid -fast memories
That trickle in my sleep towards the oblivion of forgetfulness.
Inducing amnesia with countless bottoms of potent liquid dear
I slumber subtly through the motions of Everyday.
Yet never before have I ever been more awake.
With crystal eyes of pure black points
I see the hues that weave the strands of blue in that same sea where I sundered you.
Like an impotent ghost you haunt me trying vainly
To grasp the hems of my frock, to lay me bare to the ravages of time.
Like a beast you devoured me licking my life till there was nothing left but my bones.
Yet you never really had me because I am all my own.
To the mountains tops where dew turned to ice
I flew like a pixie, escaping barely from the clutches of anguish.
And there I shall reside for the rest of today, till you will not even be part of my yesterday.
To the bottom of the ocean where life slows down to a fraction of a heartbeat
Where visions are vivid and wild and unconfining and absolutely liquid
I shall linger until I find a corner of the universe uninhabited by such oppressive silence.
Let me be, I shall swim to the edge of wakefulness
And challenge the gods to strike me down with a thunderbolt of clarity.
I leave my body to the torrents of time, violated by the fierceness of this desire
To be rid of you; To drink thy life’s elixir to the dregs and spit it as poison.
Totally bereft of affect, assuaged by the conviction of eternal emancipation
from the denuding, absolutely destructive commands of your avaricious love
I shall descend to the bottom of the ocean and inundate my senses
with the bliss of irrevocable indifference.
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