Episode-2 Poem by Kimberly Lindsey

When in the midst of a depressive episode,
The mind can not make sense of anything at all.
When the mind can not tell whether one is up
And the other is down, it is truly bizarre.

Looking back I can see, that it was completely irrational.
But when I was there, I could not see; all I could do was fail.
It scares me looking back, to see how far off my mind was.
And quickly and easily I got there.

I do not like that place, it is as if you are in a circus
In the fun house, and house of horror…all at once.
The problem is that it is not fun,
And the house of horror is your mind.

To question everything, every decision that you make,
And second guess your every move at least a dozen times or two,
And for that to take mere moments… then you start all over again.
Your mind shows you no mercy, and you can not make it stop.

Eventually your mind can take no more,
And you just want it to stop, no matter what.
Before your heart and head explode,
You completely shut down, curled in a ball
You know nothing more.

Then, you finally, gain control.
The relief you feel is great,
But now the pain you feel is intense,
And you’re sick to your stomach, to boot.

But all in all, you better,
Because the episode is over.
But why in the first place,
And how did it get so bad?