Eye Contact Poem by Samantha McKinnon

You look but don't see.
I won't let you.
With the innocence I've painted onto my eyes
It appears as if I am the doll
That you see me as.
I tint the windows to my soul.
You look in but see fog.
It's not yet time
For me to lose you.
Slowly the sky clears and the paint chips, the tint fades.
You remain safe, but not for long.
You charge at me,
Hammer held high, eyes wild.
You want in.
You swing until you hit my soul.
Blood gushes as my scars are reopened.
Smoke billows out.
You try to look away
But you can't without understanding.
You try to pull me out of the darkness whirling inside of me.
But, I'm too far gone.
You search for the me you knew you loved.
But, the more you look
The less you like.
Now, you're free to go.
You knew you loved me
But now
You can't.
No one can
And I could never ask that
Of anyone.
The only difference
Between them and you is
I could actually love you,
But no one else.
I lost you
Because of eye contact.