Flawless English - Poem by William Chaplar
If the English language was indeed one without flaws,
inlaws—once the divorce was final—would become outlaws.
There'd be a whole new way for us to spell words such as sleigh.
And none would be confused when they looked at the word croquet.
Inflammable and flammable would sure not mean the same.
And words like claim would doubtless look a little more like fame.
Weight and height assuredly would not have different sounds.
And wounds would almost surely not be spelled the same as rounds.
There's no way that epitome would end the same as gnome.
And likely, neither one of them would sound the same as comb.
Hyperbole sure wouldn't end the same way as does pole.
And neither one would be a word that sounds the same as soul.
Straight, given all those letters, would sound longer than ado.
By no means would segue look like it ought to rhyme with queue.
Progress and Congress definitely would be opposites.
And words like blitz would probably be spelled the same as pits.
Yes, flawless English would not look at all as it does now,
because the way most words are spelled just couldn't be allowed.
But flawlessness in language is a thing that cannot be.
So it's replete with some incomprehensibility.
The better part of logic, then, (or so it seems to me) ,
is learn your tongue as best you can. Wouldn't you agree?
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