Leah Ayliffe

Gold Star - 6,300 Points (June 8,1991 / Toronto)

Flipside Of Sadness - Poem by Leah Ayliffe

I always knew it to be true
That sadness is a luxury for those who have the time
To sit in contemplation wondering if they’re happy.
I believe it to be necessary in order to figure things out
But maybe it is too overbearing when the hours waste away.
I knew I needed something here
To keep me grounded while my head swims in the clouds
And I guess I finally have found something
Something to hold me in happiness or strange distraction
Just long enough to make me believe I can survive here in the physical realm.
I don’t know if it’s a man who lights up my life, the fire of my loins,
Like Nabokov wrote about the man in love.
Or the lure of a new purpose ever since important people took an interest in me
My thoughts and future, where I might want to end up, who I may want to be.
I don’t mind much that it could be a con, ‘cause I believe in their pretty stories
In all the beautiful things they think I can do, while making such gorgeous money too.
I’m busy now, driving across cities every day, sipping on hot coffee on the commute
That used to be the core of my worst nightmares.
Caught up in the day to day gig – somehow it became a lovely affair to entertain.
Even though this woman is dressed in heels caught in the routine,
The people which guide her tell her dreams of something more than the same old system others have found themselves in.
This is different. I repeat to myself. This is different.
These people don’t buy into the crap the world tries to sell,
They begged me to take the risk.
Now we’re busy on the flipside, selling dreams to dreamers like us.
I pray that it’s not a lie, a sparkling decoy, though its biding my time in a creative way.
I was so worried with what comes next...
Now nothing seems to be standing in my way.
I went to the edge, and I made the call... I jumped... I let myself fall.
I’ll let you know if I land crashing violently into the sea
Or if I fly like the angel in the sky I know I meant to be.

Topic(s) of this poem: fall

Comments about Flipside Of Sadness by Leah Ayliffe

  • Daniel Brick (11/12/2015 10:43:00 PM)

    I say truly I'm happy for you, Leah! Somewhere Whitman wrote WHEN YOU TOUCH THIS BOOK YOU TOUCH A MAN. I hope you don't think me presumptuous in saying after reading your poems - as you write them - for many weeks (Has it been a full year? I'm not sure.) , I have a sense of your life and its unfoldings. Your resilience and embrace of experience are wonderful traits! Your involvement in the world is committed and generous. And you don't complain: the past you absorb, the future you anticipate, the present you bustle in.
    And now in this poem you bravely and sincerely set out in a new direction, at least that's the impression I took from it. You seem to be aware of the fragility of things, that you are after all living on the flipside of sadness, not in some utopian realm. But it's the adventure of life, the challenges that motivate you, and your writing makes it so real and vivid and so rewarding. I once had a friend who sought freedom and adventure, and he closed his letters with EXCELSIOR! !

    and you don't complain: you're mmitted and generous.
    (Report) Reply

    0 person liked.
    0 person did not like.
  • Kumarmani Mahakul (11/10/2015 5:49:00 PM)

    Thoughts and future shine in this marvelous context. Wisely penned....10 (Report) Reply

Read all 2 comments »

Read this poem in other languages

This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.

I would like to translate this poem »

word flags

Poem Submitted: Tuesday, November 10, 2015

Poem Edited: Friday, May 20, 2016

[Report Error]