Floyd Zimmerman

Rookie - 0 Points (01/06/1989 / England, U.K)

Great Expectations - Poem by Floyd Zimmerman

Wake up. Okay,
The world is still all here.
Just checking.

Something will happen today
I feel it in my bones.

The neighbours f*ck
The dogs bark
The weather is paramount,
We are not amused.

A whore on the street sells her petals
Of life to the dead.
Men in suits sell approximations
Of death to the dying.
A baby bursts from the gut.

It's all quite the dirty business

Men try to look serious.
Women talk like the men
Or burden indifference like weights.
The children sit on the rocks.
Pictures of death in red crayon.

Some people are born complete.
Others are born in pieces
Like a jigsaw puzzle,

They cannot put themselves together.

Comments about Great Expectations by Floyd Zimmerman

  • (9/13/2009 3:14:00 PM)

    I like this alot floyd you wrote in a very dickensian manner which tied in with the title of the poem if that was the intention it was very clever indeed, well done, i give it a 10. (Report) Reply

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  • (9/12/2009 7:37:00 PM)

    ah...i see. this is intense. i like how you described everything. very good (Report) Reply

  • (9/8/2009 7:12:00 PM)

    Very graphic depiction of life's negativities.I think you could use the word fornication instead of f-.it's more sophisticated sounding..what a frightening picture you paint but that's what raw realism is about...your poetry has a very distinctive style and as an emerging poet you can go vey far..good luck and keep writing...a ten.. (Report) Reply

  • (9/5/2009 3:36:00 PM)

    mmmm you paint quite the picture of hell on earth and it's a picture that is shocking yet most folks live with it day by day, ignoring the obvious because it's the only way to survive.....as for me I live in my own little world or I would have gone under years ago.....still there are beautiful things in the world if we look to see, many are wondrous and truly amazing but of course every up has it's downside....great poem, made me think....didn't like the line 'A baby bursts from the gut' but other than that pretty good....... Ruth (Report) Reply

  • C. P. Sharma (9/3/2009 9:53:00 PM)

    A whore on the street sells her petals
    Of life to the dead.
    Men in suits sell approximations
    Of death to the dying.
    A baby bursts from the gut.

    These words reveal the hypocrisy of the civilized society.
    (Report) Reply

  • (9/3/2009 7:27:00 PM)

    Pictures of death in red crayon.-> a tragedic line.

    true thoughts!
    (Report) Reply

  • (8/27/2009 6:56:00 PM)

    it's sometimes an indecent world my friend, any other expression simply would not do (Report) Reply

  • Hebert Logerie Sr. (8/27/2009 1:17:00 PM)

    It is a beautiful poem but you should replace that 4 letter-words. I have attempted to write this type of expression, common sense and decency always prevailed. (Report) Reply

  • (8/27/2009 12:36:00 AM)

    i like the way you ended the poem. and i understand your meaning. i am impressed by your work. you are very creative

    (Report) Reply

  • (8/26/2009 7:35:00 PM)

    interesting....a little confusing....i would suggest that you join some of the ideas present more smoothly....but other than that pretty good :) (Report) Reply

  • (8/25/2009 10:19:00 PM)

    Whoa way cool. Some are born complete = [ and some cant put themselves together.... (Report) Reply

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Poem Submitted: Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Poem Edited: Wednesday, August 26, 2009

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