Grinning Happily [revised] Poem by Margaret Alice Second

I got hold of oats and chockbitz while doing research into
electricity networks - overwhelmed by boredom, enjoying
the process of eating so much I gave up worrying about
medical advice to abstain for hopefully a pain-free life to
exist, no salt, no sugar, no carbohydrates in excess, no
wholewheat, no bran, no bread, no cake, no chocolates

No alcohol, no butter, no oil, no fat, only vegetables bland,
certain fruit and meat once a week - after trying this and
feeling super-miserable, caught in a despondent depression
causing catatonia while being insomniac; I am compelled to
dig my grave with my teeth, at least I shall have fun before
stumbling over the proverbial banana peel and dying

Grinning happily, a chocolate in one hand and a classic
James Bond Martini in the other – Prosit!