[i Am Suddenly Overwhelmed] Poem by Maria Schmitt

I am suddenly overwhelmed with a
feeling – I should be somewhere else
entirely – this is not me, one is lost
in the waves, each bubble, each
grain of sand in the breeze
falling between my fingers, lost and drifting
in the deep blue abyss,
a floating wave of hair,
a fan outward
as I dream and be and go
away from reality into my mind.

Two nights ago I dreamt I was at the beach – California –
and my soul was calling
for the water to absorb me,
hold me, caress me – it was
my sole desire.
I was there and happy and
alive and free
away from this hell I’m
dreaming and living each day – it’s
nonsense.

I am these notes, this dream,
words unspoken, but heard.
I am a goddess on the beach, hands
Stretched out behind me as a gust
whips across the water and into me,
carrying me with it.

I become the breeze.

To be anything but myself now
would heal me, steal me, little
curves fill my mind
and hours spent pondering,
listening, with a closed
mouth force my ears to become
dominant, whisper to me,
run your finger down my
cheek –
breathe us away from here –
but gone now you are
once again the waves crashing and
swirling, up and in, up and in
swallow me and taste me – let
me melt into you and become
one with that which I dreamt
of and desire.

Opening up my soul I invite in
the sea and the sand and the
warm rushing breeze, bring
me love and I will bring
you myself –
my hopes and dreams are all I
can give but my
finger gliding between
each grain, each bubble,
each breath of you shall
make you shiver for me.