I Live - Poem by James Grengs
The cold feel of metal against your skull.
You hate you, you hate me, you hate all.
-I said no, you said yes-
Trembling fingers, gingerly toying with your life.
You hate, but life? Breath?
No one there,
No one with mercy, or any thought
For anyone but themselves.
You hate them, too.
-I would stop you, but I am not there:
You chased me away.-
Boiling in your soul,
A witches' brew, slowly stealing
Your grip tightens, resolve
Lending strength to your will.
Will to release.
-You are on the brink, I cannot watch.-
Falling on the deaf ears
Of your selfish gods of glory.
You are convinced, by the darkness,
That you are right, all right.
-I say wrong, you say right.-
You replay our screams,
The anger. I lie asleep;
It is past midnight.
I am unaware, being blissfully in dreams- elsewhere.
Chill air through your open window.
A brief lucidity, a glimpse in your mind
Of true reality.
Normalcy scares you.
But I do not hear it.
-I do not want to know where you are-
The temptation seizes you,
Freedom a finger's width away.
But freedom scares you;
You hate me. Sudden,
Physical pain. You fight
The temptation again.
Your subconscious, battling
-I with my power keep you from freedom.-
You cry, now, tears
Pouring down your cheeks,
Onto the piece of paper before you.
I HATE YOU.
-I love where I am, you hate where I am.-
You see your own words,
The temptation comes again,
Screaming, sounding horribly like
A child in pain:
You, standing on a cliff,
Move your finger, and fall,
I hear it, an explosion in the dark,
Awakening me out of a dream-turned-nightmare.
I scream, silently, knowing your pain.
What have I done?
Who has the greater pain now?
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