I Wish I Could Explain Poem by JeQuethia Jones

I wish I could explain to you how heavy the pain is in my heart.
I can't identify the cause, but the pain is weighing my heart down.
Every day, I aim to take things one step at a time.
Impossible, no can do, everything must be taking care of at once.
I'm searching for the way out, not able to understand the way in.
My world is crumbling to pieces, as small as sand grains.
It is pointless in trying to put the pieces back together.

I wish I could explain to you how heavy the pain is in my heart.
Feels like a piece of my heart shreds off at every single heart beat.
This is an unrecognized feeling that has an agenda of its own.
I try to push the pressure of the pain to the back of my mind.
Doing so caused the weight of this burden to weigh down my soul.
Every chance I get I try to breath in deep to refresh my mind.
Failing to do so each time, reminded of the pain once I exhale.

I wish I could explain to you how heavy the pain is in my heart.
Then maybe, it will ease the sharp stabs that I feel all over my body.
I try to reach out for a helping hand from someone who can guide me.
Worthless effort when I don't know whose hand I really need.
Lost in this phase of torture and confusion, I am blinded.
Unable to see the source, unable to see the out, completely unable.
Can't justify my action, can't validate my scars, can't rationalize my pain.

I wish I could explain to you how the pain is in my heart.
Every reason is a whisper, falling soft upon my ears.
I'm contemplating on the correct moves to makes.
I was unaware that this pain is reflecting in my everyday life style.
Continuous headaches, every step I take breaks my body down.
What is it that will rid me of this unwelcome ache and uninvited tears?
Filed under kaput, handed to the good will, there is no more usage out to me.

If only, somehow I could just explain how heavy the pain is in my heart.