I Wounder Poem by Kara Aleid was Thomas

it seems ive suffered
i cant figure any of it out
my life is a mess
i just want him to save me from this world
to give me a rest
i just want him to think of me for a change
to be their for me without all the excuses,
its like im on lock down
i wish i could awake and see loads of sweet things
to see how much i mean to him
to know that when i breath in and out
pain rides over me like a ocean of waves
i just want him to show love for me in all the ways possible,
i tell him over an over my feelings
i always wounder why i bother
nothing gets fixed it always ends in 'I just have to wait'
yet im trying more than i should
i break down wondering is it me?
did i do this to him?
dose he want to be with me?
its all just to much
ive done nothing but wait for him
ive waited for our journey to start
i wounder will it ever begin?
i know nothing will ever go back to the way it was
all i want is him that's the problem here,
my heart feels all tangled up
im lost in lies, feelings, i cant figure him out
i feel low constantly i cant break out of this barrier
i wounder does he think about me, i always think of him
im hurting i just want some love shown
it feels like im falling out of his arms
im falling out of his reach
hes just letting me fall
hes not pulling me closer he's just pushing me away
the truth is i miss him,
i miss the way we were
he makes me wait
all i know it that ive waited so long for things to change, to get better
to learn it anit ever gunna happen again
my heart melts and crumbles
will he actually shows he cares,
when he swears at me it makes me feel unwanted
like he actually wants to me go away and never return
the long distance thing dont help
i just feels more let down ever year
im i asking for to much?
i wish i knew what i could do better?
as i sit and cry my heart out
i cant help but want him here right.

my pain doesn't matter maybe some day it will.

love hurts but where would we be without it?