Is There A Choice? Poem by James Walter Orr

How shall I go when I do go?
Shall I hitch up my mismatched team
And start out for the golden west;
Fulfillment for a boyhood dream?

Will fertile valleys lie before,
Or arid deserts block my way?
Will lofty mountains rear their heads
In their majestic proud display?

When I stake out my life-time prize,
Will herds of cattle, pastures green,
And streams of water, flowing pure,
Define my future, all serene?

Will fear of fables fan the flames,
Dismay desire, engage my mind,
Plant fancied failings in my thoughts,
With free deductions turning blind?

When I do leave from where I am
Shall I at last in tandem go,
Or shall I walk a lonely trail,
To some far site I do not know?

Shall I go faceless, with a mask,
My future faced, fully unknown?
Shall I go at some master’s whim,
Like some lost leaf, by breezes blown?

Shall I now see, as time runs out,
The often fabled rainbow’s end?
Shall I perceive the hill’s far side,
And know the furthest river’s bend?

Shall I know how the Phoenix rose,
And solve the riddle of the Sphinx;
Drink down a glass of Pan’s best wine,
And learn just what Pandora thinks?

How shall I go when I do go?
Will acrid teardrops stain my eye,
As loved ones hover o'er my bed,
And bow their heads and softly cry?

I hope that I’ll disintegrate
And spread my ions near each star,
Thus near each loved one, to remain,
Where neither time nor tale can mar.