Keep A Stiff Upper Lip Poem by Stanley Cooper

I’ve been told, “keep a stiff upper lip” when things go all awry
I seriously doubt this plan will work, but I’ll give it my best try
Credit cards all maxed out, I’m sinking down in debt
But with my stiffened upper lip, there is no cause to fret

My cat jumped in the oven, emerging quite half baked
Her other half, it seems to me, looks like a charcoaled steak
My house now is all flooded from a copper piping leak
If it wasn’t for my upper lip, you’d really hear me shriek

Just in case this lip thing works, I’ll stiffen, now, my lower
Perhaps it’ll cause these tragedies to reach me somewhat slower
If it ever puts to rest my personal apocalypse
I’ll forever be so grateful to both my stiffened lips