Life Poem by Yash Nundlal

Life



The subject of today is the past of yesterday.
You quarrel about your pain but you forget that equal
means the same
We are of same blood, same place
Yes, we have a different body, a different face,
But we all feel the same way.
We are all given a path that we must choose,
But this is wrong as no path will choose you.
Paths are created, never brought alive
To succeed you must create your own that possesses your
drive.
The first steps you take as a child are the most significant
in other's eyes
The first risk you take as 'made up' is the most significant
step in your eyes
Understanding the world is a great knowledge to have,
But understanding your life may thicken the word itself.

COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Jefferson Carter 04 September 2017

Yash, too many abstractions here (past, drive, significant, etc.) to raise this poem above the level of uninteresting life lessons…Maybe start reading some good contemporary poets in English (Mary Oliver, Billy Collins) if you want to improve? If you have time, check out my new website: jeffersoncarterverse.com Let me know how you like it. Yrs, JC

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