My Own Puppet Poem by gothic fairy

I'm tangled between strings that make my every move.
unable to think for myself or have my say.
my steps are counted for, my words written and planned.
I'm my own puppet but no one knows.
i draw on a smile and paint over my tears.
being careful not to let anything show.
you say you know me but not the true me.
no one knows who i really am underneath the layers of paint.
i smile as if nothings wrong and fool anyone who sees.
they don't know that the face i wear isn't really me.
underneath the paint lies sorrow and despair.
feelings locked so deep inside that Ive forgotten their even there.
these strings hold me back and control me as they wish.
I'm not myself but the breathing dead.
my heart beats yet doesn't make a sound.
i feel but don't show.
i don't want to let anyone know.
I'm loosing control of myself as the days go by...
forgetting who i really am inside.