My Shamed Face Poem by Kathryn Brookins

Never have I felt the shame on my face..
as I do now, trying to mentally keep up the pace.
How could I wrong you so horribly wrong...
I see my actions as weak, not pure and strong.
How could I shame myself in the very way,
that I have let others go for doing in past days.
I never saw that I could be that person...
How could all this have happen?
I saw myself through your very eyes...
oh how I received a massive surprise,
not of joy, but shame and guilt....
how can I look you in the face, with this I have built.
I never wanted to hurt you, and could not see that I had,
How you have hung in there with me, when i was rotten and bad.
I have not been this sorry, in my whole life...
I feel as through I have stabbed myself with a knife...
right in the gut where my emotions lie..
I see that I am the knot that was tied...
Everytime you tried to open up and let me in,
Here I'd come, and do it again...
I can see your face, and hear your voice say,
'Here we go again' Same bull, just another day.
How is it that you have loved me enough,
to stay connected to me, and not just leave in a rush?
My face shames me, Now that I see me, as you...
I can honestly say, I know how to change this, I know what to do.
I will never hurt you like this again...
And when my eyes burned wide open, I then begin...
To understand everything clear and uncut...
It wasn't you that kept the door shut.
I am sorry, I truly am... Words can not express...
This horrible shame and deep unrest...
I will prove myself to you for the rest of my life...
No more drinking, no more drama and strife..
I will prove my love to you, sincere and loyal...
My shame has brought my blood to a boil...
You never deserved the road I gave...
But if I have not seen too late, perhaps it can all be saved.
I would not blame you if you turned away...
I only ask, to let me show you, please stay.

By: Kathryn Brookins