Natural Selection Poem by Cullen Flynch

I am a little field mouse
All fur and whiskers twitchin'
To eat the cheese upon this trap
I must admit, I'm itchin'
And all my body fluids will be sprayed across the kitchen

I am a tiny baby bird
No feathers, as you see
If I can scramble from this nest
I'll plummet from the tree
Upon the path I'll lay until somebody steps on me

I am a little hedgehog
All prickly and fat
I'll roll up on this highway
And a car will squash me flat
When other vehicles whistle past, I'll be their welcome mat.

I am a little kitten
It's my first time out of doors
That bulldog's bowl is somewhere
Where I'd like to dip my claws
And my furry feline body will be crushed between his jaws

I am a scaly sea bass
If I had the power of speech
I'd say: “that morsel on the line
Is well within my reach”
And I'll be hooked out through my lip to flounder on the beach

I am a little fox cub
And it really must be said
That it's my desire to tunnel
Underneath the chicken shed
And the ginger-headed farmer's boy will shoot me in the head

I am a spider in the bath
I'll wait until you're bare
Then scuttle from the overflow
And give you quite a scare
And you'll flush me down the plug-hole with the soapy gunk and hair

The moral for all animals
Is, if you're not very bright
Beware of hooks and traps and cars
And premature flight
Remember, some dog's barks are surely better than their bite