Not My Normal Self: ( Poem by nicky joyce

Starting to feel sadden and depressed
I helped you find yourself when you were distressed
Feeling alone unthought-of and deprived
For some unknown reason brings tears to my eyes
I ask how you are and how it’s been
I do this cause I care shame u don’t see
I’m ok in a tough bird
Getting on with life even though it does hurt
Getting shut out well so use to that
Guess I thought though you were bigger then that
Never mind I say quite a lot
Making excuses in my head to try untie this knot
Gut feeling kicks in and so does the past
It’s not you it’s just what’s been done
Shame I think things like a loaded gun
There’s life and yours is free
Mine is full of responsibilities
I wouldn’t change me for a million pound
One thing I know it will never turn out
So free and independent like a sawing bird
Unlike myself just a normal caring girl
But all said and done time to face the facts
I knew where I stood just an everyday piece of wood
Still I would never change it
Will just take it on the chin
Hide what I’m thinking and feeling
Keep it forever locked in.