Old Women Make Me Horny Poem by Randy Johnson

I'm a twenty-five year old man and I've been told that I'm weird.
People say I've become a nut just like they feared.
They were shocked because it's ridiculous and silly.
I get an erection when I see Granny on the Beverly Hillbillies.
Pamela Anderson called me and asked me out but I refused to meet her.
Sexy women like her give me a limp peter.
Old broads are the only women who arouse me.
I choke my chicken every time I watch Aunt Bee.
My friends ask me if I'm going to take a wife.
I tell them that I'd love to marry that old fat lady on the facts of life.
Last week I mailed a letter to the publisher of Playboy.
I told Hefner that he should make a new magazine and call it Grayboy.