Dan Lundahl

Scared - Poem by Dan Lundahl

My feelings, they have grown dry,
Lookin' at myself, wondering why,
I have become such a man, a man who hates himself,
Old and dusty, like a book on an old bookshelf..

I feel so empty, and I feel so alone,
Wondering why, and when I'll ever get home,
And will I ever get there, do I deserve it?
I'm just a man, scared to face that I quit..

Just wandering towards happiness, and perhaps a little,
Bit of sanity, enough to figure out this riddle,
Where did I go wrong, what did I do?
And how did I come to hurt you so bad too..

I knew I had lost my mind, and I know I am not me,
But if only you, the world, and everyone else could see,
I'm trying hard, real hard, doing the best I can,
To step up, face my troubles, and become a man..

I've overcome obstacles, courses, but I've also fled,
I'm scared of running, I might die as I tread,
But to have you forgive me, will demand all of my heart,
Scared of finishing this life, with you so far apart..

Please take me back, come here, hold my hand,
I'm just a man, scared to climb up and stand,
I could be a mountain, but I'm not, heck what am I,
I'm scared, as mentioned before, even too scared to cry..

I try to shed tears, but none of them fall,
Standing by myself, against the house wall,
I keep hitting myself, hitting my head so hard,
But my other hand fights back, a part of me is still on guard..

Could I ever come back, would you ever look at me again,
If I saved you, if I made you smile, well maybe then..
But even then I'm scared to fail, scared to fall so far,
I don't know, honey, I love you, but I have an eternal scar..

I'm almost now, even too scared to move,
I don't even know what to say, or what I'm trying to prove,
Can I get you back? Would you want me, or not?
It's just like back then, when cupid shot..

But now everything is different, and it's not the same,
I'm sad and frightened to say, that I have only myself to blame,
So what do I do? Who do I ask for help, what do I do..
Please tell me, someone, anyone.. But can I even look at you?

I'm not myself right now, I have not been for long,
I have no faith, I feel no love, and I'm no longer strong..
If I'm not me, then who am I now,
If you see who I am, please just tell me now..

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Poem Submitted: Monday, March 18, 2013

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