Poetic Judy L Emery
Shadows On The Wall - Poem by Poetic Judy L Emery
SHADOWS ON THE WALL
You seem to always find your way back
even when I never wanted you too.
You come back into my life
Just to making me feel so ashamed all over again.
You have been hiding all this time
in one of the rooms in my house,
but I was to scared like a muse to find out.
I was so alone where you had left me
locked away in a cold darken room,
You say: ‘'What has been going on
all this time you had been away.''
I would just look at him with no words
I can tell he was up to no good,
I could see he was lying another time around,
Just to see what I would say.
All this time he has been playing more head games,
He is my abuser, My nightmare.
I would hear his words saying to me:
‘'You're so sad, why are you sad my darling? ''
I could see the smile on his face as he would speak
walking towards me.
What do you see my psychic queen,
Come on tell me your dreams!
It's the age we now live in, so go on love your sadness,
because I love seeing you in a big dirty mess,
people will only think your losing your mind
because they are all on my side.
Don't you hear the latest gossip,
your are like a little sad doll that no one wants,
I just looked at him with tears flowing from my eyes.
He pushed my down like I was animal.
His abuse cut me very deep, all I could do is scream,
But no one could ever hear me.
And if they did, they didn't care to help me.
I had to learn to build up courage
I had to face the facts
and stay fair minded and fearless,
I needed to get away…
When I did I would count my blessings,
soon I started to live my own life,
I bout me a coat and got me a dog.
I even started dancing
in the cold pouring autumn rain
just to wash away all my pains.
But no matter what I did
this old memories started making its way back.
I felt fear all the time, I had to look over my shoulders
I look to the right and to the left.
My sadness had started all over again.
I would see him in my sleep,
that is when I started having bad dreams,
When I would awake I started to scream.
I would remember everything,
I started seeing his shadows on the wall
why he was walking down the hall.
Oh, how I could hear him calling my name.
Oh, hear comes the pain,
He is my critic, my abuser, my living nightmare.
But when it was all said and done
I still kept moving on.
Poetic Judy Emery 1999
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