Something Slimy In My Pants Poem by Robert Edgar Burns

There was something slimy in my pants,
As I sat there coming home from France.
I reached inside and felt around,
While something squishy moved around.

The stewardess said “Sir, please sit down, ”
While I jumped and squealed just like a clown.
Each time I caught it, that thing would slip.
This wasn’t a very encouraging trip.

I dropped my britches and heard cat calls.
Right at that moment I felt quite small.
But I didn’t stop to show I care,
For there was something strange
Going on down there!

Inside my underpants soft and squishy,
We came to discover a Red Snapper fishy.
It had been put there to forget the depression
I was going through, my look at your expression!

Next time I think I will use something very furry.
I hope it works for me, as it did for Bill Murray.
But one thing is for certain, it won’t have any teeth.
Just to think of that gives me cold and shivering creeps!