Tell Me Poem by Mwenyeji Spikes

TELL ME,

Are you happy in denial of what you used to feel?
Are my secrets still safe with you.
I need to know in this slithering paranoia that creeps
up close repressing my hopes to salvage what's left of what we used to
be
my heart in runs and yours just indifferent
tell me what could I say to smoother your heart of stone
that was once beautiful clay now
gone hard, tough to break, impossible to mend
I pretend not to feel no more?

Tell me How did it feel sleeping on all those texts,
Was it sweet as a bed of blue ticks,
I dont mean to be a pest in my protest for a
tension.
That I should still maneuver around
curve this insecurities that engulf me
I thought we was real now all we got is you showing up in filters,
I know we can't feign the good vibes no more but still cannot help but think, what if.

Tell me, what if we could rewind back time, and play back all the good
memories, would it change a thing?
I know you still creep up my Instagram, and check snaps on my chat
just incase one was directed at you
beneath your solid show I know
there is a place where our fluid energy still flow, tell is that place
empty or are you letting other prey on what we built.
Time & again I flip my phone to check and see of a text that perhaps
accidentally came from you but we both know our egos won't let us play
first move so feelings we throw like Tom braidy yet wait n pray that
things change.
Tell me is our hour glass still to watch, are this feelings still worth to toss?
Tell me that even in the next life your heart will still be mine