The Man He Is And Was Poem by Melanie Weeks

'I'll live forever'
He says, and he drinks another beer.
I asked him what about us,
His family? His wife and children?
he drinks when he's off,
He smokes all the time.
He says he's not gonna
End up dead.

He used to be so strong,
Used to be my hero.
Sure he works,
Sure he's good,
but at home it's like he's not here
When he's drunk and smokin'.

The smell of beer and smoke
Lingers in the house.
With pain i watch him slipping
Ever so deeper
Into nasty, smelly abivion.

He staggers when he walks,
He slurrs when he talks.
Says one thing,
Then changes it later.

So lost and in pain,
Drinks 'cause he thinks
It'll take it all away.
And I'm not the only one
Who worries more each day.

Day by day,
It's like watching suiside.
Slowly but surely dieing
Inside and out.
His eyes begining to dull.

I sit here and wonder,
What did I do wrong?
He doesn't like it here,
He doesn't want to stay.

He says he loves us,
His family, so dear,
But it seems he's lieing,
Else he'd seek help.

He says he'll help me
With schooling or jobs,
But I don't want help.
Not that kind.

I want help to find
The man he used to be.