The Man Who Hates Israel Poem by Jan Oskar Hansen

The Man who hates Israel

Today we had lunch at a restaurant called Israel and,
yes it was Jewish but I didn’t see an Islamist bomber
ready to blow himself and us up to King David come.
The food was good and later over coffee I noticed they
served food fit for diabetics.

What amused me was that one of the dishes, hummus with
something was recommended by lady Gaga which I take
to be a cross- dressing singer. Where are the Jews?
Finally, an elderly couple arrived she looked like Isaac Rabin’s
wife and the man a scientist, to my chagrin they left
the food was too Middle Eastern for them they spoke English
with a Dutch accent. The Hollanders are really mean, I gave a lift
to a prince of the house of Orange he lived quite far from me
but didn’t even offer me a cup of coffee.

I remember him telling me that the crown prince of Norway
had shamefully married a commoner, a waitress of all things.
I digress, The Israeli restaurant served meatless food which
suits me well, only when I came home I wondered if the place
was a cover for Mossad’s and they take no interest in me.
No matter how much I holler about the Zionists they are not
sending assassins after me so I have to live with my failures.