The Want. Poem by zainab khawaja

Theres no point of loving someone so much,
You can hope to get some love back,
And keep hoping until all hope dies,
But the hopes you have can never die,

Wishes you have remain wishes in your heart,
Which no tears, no God can touch,
You can try and try to pretend Youre okay,
But all you know is that youre not okay,

A prayer is what then comes from inside,
With tears and tears running down fast,
All you want is for god to help,
Only to find out that answer he wont your prayers,
For sins you commited in your past,

All might happen for the good,
But what you want can never be for the good,
Why does it matter if you have been wronged,
You cant help it, cant stop the want,

For as long as its been youve waited for someone to come,
But came so many just not the one,
Youre dying to have him by your side,
But you get to know that he doesnt want your side,

Hate you do your destiny,
Shaped things so cruelly,
Why cant things be the way we want?
Can your love for god make him listen to your heart?

Can he then change whats coming and whats not?
Dreams i dreamt i want to dream again,
And hope that everything will change,
That together we can be some day,

And my god will create some space in that heart,
Which has loved someone else for so long!
I try to stop myself each day,
From having so much conviction in God and love,

For someday everything might break,
And i might have nothing to hold onto,
And the love i seeked i wont ever get,
And tears inside will finally fall down,

But for now this is all i can wish upon,
I dont wanna know that he'll never come,
And if it has to be that way,
I wanna speak to God some day.