Toilet Seat Poem by Ivan Donn Carswell

I am a man and need not change
the way I am; I’m free of toilet
agonies and trained by mother’s
hand to competence. I disagree
the toilet seat resolves how one
should pee no matter what you
ladies think – my male design
precedes the toilet anyway.

Come to think of it our genders
were established long before this
damn debate began; today no
sanity exists in claims that vanity
is compromised to see the seat
upright. It never bothers me!
© 29 January 2010, I. D. Carswell