United Then Divided Poem by ash enslow

Its been 28 years and Im ready to face
the pain i endured at an early age.

I came into the world pre mature
i just couldn'd wait to break free from her

exiting out from the toxic womb
away from alcohol and drugs
straight into the adoption room

I was bounced around for a short little while
then chosen by a family who wanted me for their child.

I started off eating crickets in the warm dessert sand
then we moved to Palo Alto in the big brown van

About 5 years later, i'll never forget that day
daddy packed his BMW and just drove away

I remember mommy sobbing holding my little hand
her family crushed and divided by a cowardly man

my older brother locked away in his room
started his decent into his independent doom.

But me being just a young little girl
i really didnt understand what had just occured

growing up in two seperate homes, being left all alone
cuz mom had to work, and dad with an agenda of his own

my brother and i were now in the middle of a nasty divorce
problems arose when dad refused to pay child support

So i took the role of the rebellious kid
i fouhgt and refused most everything that i did

As i grew older actions got bolder, hearts froze colder
family ties would soon smolder

Brother detatched couldn't wait to escape
he was the star child, and constantly praised

me on the other hand took the more beaten path
made a run for the darkside and never looked back

so who is to blame for a family divided?
well i blame my father for the love he never provided.

Always striving to be daddy; s little girl
but never could i reach the bar he raised too high for her

left with burning resentment in all sorts of ways
i thank god for my mother, and her kind gental praise.

mom did the best to raise two kids on her own
i payed her back by creating hell in her home

As i look back into my early years
its no wonder i cried all my hate into tears

One more thing to say before this poem is sent
i hope your happy dad with the time we never spent

Im done trying to be perfect for you
your so cold and callus i'll never get through

now you can see that your left without me
there is a void in my heart where your supposed to be

try to be strong when you finally realize
the damage you caused with your lies and false pride

i hope you regret never knowing your daughter
i think i understand why you didnt try harder
HOW COULD I EXPECT YOU TO GIVE LOVE
THAT YOU NEVER GOT FROM YOUR FATHER?