Bryony Sheldon

Gold Star - 7,136 Points (13/09/2003)

Unloved - Poem by Bryony Sheldon

When I asked you to give me a break
I didn't think you'd start at my heart.
Your paranoid antics drove me insane
And they blew my head apart.

You were slippery and disgusting
Like vomit, puss or phlegm
Your love was incarceration
And I had been condemned.

You were an obsessive control freak
So how am I the one to blame?
I broke my back for you, I did no wrong,
So why do you think that I should change?

You said that you'd do anything for me,
But you never listened to a word I said.
Looking back, I see that you wore two faces,
Looking back, I hated both of them.

I was your puppet on a chain-
You broke my heart to keep me in check-
So why don't you just give me a break? !
Please- start at my neck!

Topic(s) of this poem: grief , heartache, love, neglect, sad love, sadness


Poet's Notes about The Poem

Hey! PoemHunter only says that this is my best poem because it has the most comments- THIS IS FAR FROM MY BEST. About 70% of my poems are better than this trash, so please don't judge me based off of this.
Also, I know that the title has a poor connection- for some dumb reason I thought it'd be a great idea to limit all my poems to 1 word titles (with one exception) - this means that a load of my poems have titles that don't actually suit the poem- sorry!

Comments about Unloved by Bryony Sheldon

  • Jez Brul (7/22/2019 9:53:00 AM)

    Give me a break and let me out from your car...I must choose to travel alone than to travel with someone who belongs to another track...The deep sentiments have been vividly expressed.10+++++ (Report)Reply

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  • (6/13/2019 5:32:00 PM)

    This poem has a good level of aggression and strength, tactics you might need in the throes of 'love.' (Report)Reply

    1 person liked.
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  • Archita Kumar (5/15/2019 9:36:00 AM)

    It's a lovely poem.The poem goes through the emotional situation a lover experiences. The want for love; The pain
    He gave to himself and the sacrifices made can be feeled when the poem is read from ones heart.Nice thoughts and very nicely expressed. Thank you for inviting me to read this beautiful poem. Please read my new poems too.
    (Report)Reply

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  • Aqua Flower (4/14/2019 6:44:00 PM)

    This is an excellent poem.You've presented good imagery describing. cruel love and how it affects us deep down to our soul. A very emotional write and well done. Good writing Bryony! 10 (Report)Reply

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  • Chinedu Dike (4/13/2019 7:07:00 PM)

    Well expressed thoughts and feelings. Heartfelt poem with strong emotions. (Report)Reply

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  • (4/12/2019 7:05:00 PM)

    Strong, sincere, bravely and well written. Very well conceived. Emotions, facts, explicit.
    Without being extreme. That was really, telling him what he deserved. Good for you!
    (Report)Reply

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  • Drtony Brahmin (2/21/2019 4:43:00 AM)

    Looking back, I see that you wore two faces,
    Looking back, I hated both of them.
    life, persons who come into your life............ problems. a good poem dear poetess. thank u. tony
    (Report)Reply

    1 person liked.
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  • Rose Marie Juan-austin (2/20/2019 2:36:00 PM)

    A vivid portrayal of a cruel love.
    Very incisive and superbly penned.
    (Report)Reply

    1 person liked.
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  • Poet Poet (2/17/2019 9:14:00 AM)

    i TOO ENDORSE cf below

    ur title shows a poor relation
    any how do as you wish
    thanks for reading my kissy poems miss
    now u may read
    MOMS SMILES TOO
    LOVE IT I'; 'M SURE
    WILL U
    (Report)Reply

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  • (2/16/2019 12:41:00 PM)

    Well written verse for an unacceptable relationship, very well worded, with well crafted and smooth flow of words as you read it.... thanks for sharing. You should have titled this " Give Me A Break" or maybe even " Get Lost" instead of " Unloved" . " Give Me A Break" would be perfect - funny in a sarcastic way, touching, but the sentiments portrayed are all true to life. (Report)Reply

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  • Edward Kofi Louis (2/10/2019 9:53:00 PM)

    Obsessive! ! ! !

    Thanks for sharing this poem with us.
    (Report)Reply

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Poem Submitted: Tuesday, February 5, 2019

Poem Edited: Thursday, August 1, 2019


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