Shalyn Stachmus

Until The Innocent Are Not Punished - Poem by Shalyn Stachmus

Believed things would end how I wanted them to,
But now I can't erase it, so what do I do?
Had hoped things would change, perhaps fix themselves, too.
But most times denial is better than truth.

Murder. A murder. Long dead and gone.
I keen like a loser, full of despond.
Abandoned alone, my love grows cold.
Lifeless I lay here, a lump in a hole.
Tried, tried, and failed to find the joy.
Dropped love, lost love; Watched love get destroyed.

I smelled something caustic, saw decay in my heart.
But now I've no love, so where do I start?
Wish I could dash to a tame place to depart,
But here my soul stays, for I am missing a part.

Murder. A murder. Long dead and gone.
Left like a loser, alone to abscond.
Lucky me, I've these amenities:
Death, damnation, dread, and disparity.
It seems like I never really knew you.
I swear that I tried to, but you'd only elude.

Poet's Notes about The Poem

This poem was one that I actually entered into a contest, which turned out to be nothing more than what I think is a scam. But I've since re-edited it, not only from the version that I submitted, but also from the original page that I first wrote it on. (I keep all my poems in a notebook, loose leaves and all, in case I ever lose them from my computer somehow.) That's not to say that this is the final draft, just that it is one of the last.

This is to my dad, and how I felt or how he made me feel after my mother died. This is about all the unanswered questions from that time period of my life and afterwards, up to now. I still don't know for sure if he did it, and I probably never will. Part of me thinks that I'm better off not ever knowing the real story...

(Original: 8-4-11/Revised: 8-28-12)

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Poem Submitted: Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Poem Edited: Tuesday, August 28, 2012

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