What It Takes (Addict's Lullaby) (If You Thought I Love You Goodbye Was A Tearjerker Buckle Up.) Poem by Josh B.

When I come to I see my bedroom light bright and blinding over my head.
As I lay there on my bed I hear a familiar voice say 'please don't be dead.'
I can barely remember hitting the vein and pushing the plunger to numb the pain. I'm feeling regret, I think I lost the draw, and pushed too far. If I could count my chances I've had plenty I feel I'll soon be a statistic in which there are too many.

They scramble for a Narcan returning with a frantic 'I can't find any, I called 9-1-1 babe please try and hold on, this can't be the end of our story. You promised me forever'

I'm trying to hold on, but to the cold I'm about to surrender.
My chest is getting heavy with every breath I can muster, mimicking my internal struggle-
Depressed-
the rhythmic beat in my chest beating less and less, I'm past the point of no return, too late to second guess.

further I fade into my eternal slumber fondly looking back at the day I gave you my number.
As you hold me in a tight embrace, my eyes start to water as I think of my kids without a father.
as tears flow from our eyes I do my best to hold on, I kiss your face, and with my last breath my final words that I mutter 'I'll always love you, please make sure the kids never wonder if they were loved by their father.'

'I'll never forget you and I love you from now until forever. Goodbye for now the familiar voice ads with tear-soaked eyes.'

the last thing that I hear before the cold pulls me under 'paramedics! Ma'am please step aside! '

next thing I know, I'm saved from the abyss two hits of Narcan and a few cracked ribs is what it took to swear off the poison so I could be a father to my kids.