Josh B.

When I wake I see there is a light placed over my head
I'm laying on some bed

as I lay in the bed I hear a familiar voice ask
...

Missing you
loving you
like I do
I drive myself crazy without you
...

what is that word again?
The one that describes me
cutting my wrist to end my life?
...

**this poem is kinda weird, i wrote it off the top of my head....w/e**

You can't change what is meant to be,
that is your set destiny.
...

As I lay here bleeding,
your name carved in my wrist

your actions were so misleading,
...

You mean the world to me
We were meant to be
You are my once upon a time
and happily ever after
...

Inside I'm broken, beaten,
and abused.
When you ask me, I'll tell you
that's the reason that I
...

When I come to I see my bedroom light bright and blinding over my head.
As I lay there on my bed I hear a familiar voice say 'please don't be dead.'
I can barely remember hitting the vein and pushing the plunger to numb the pain. I'm feeling regret, I think I lost the draw, and pushed too far. If I could count my chances I've had plenty I feel I'll soon be a statistic in which there are too many.
...

Inside my heart, I miss her.
I'll never let it show...
Because I don't want anyone to know I never wanted to
let her go.
...

I don't need you here, so let
me make that clear!
what you did filled me with
hate.
...

I can't stand you
You're dead to me
I guess that was just how it was meant to be
...

Look me in the face...
You don't deserve to be held in my sweet embrace...
Let that room in your head when I look you in the face I feel like I want to die
I begin to cry as I think to myself why? Why do I cry?
...

I just want you to know even though we are apart you and only you have my heart
in your chest it's Nestle beaten and worn but no longer torn because you are mine my heart now beats just fine you mended the brakes soothing my aches

you're wonderful find beautiful and one of a kind and you're mine! Right now our hearts my ache because our hearts are tethered and we're at the end of our rope entwined forever and it's ridiculously hard to cope with a distance between us but I swear on my life I'll make you my wife it's just a matter of when but just like me finding you your dream will come true when I say I do.
...

The word 'never' rarely ever comes to mind because in my heart I know I never want us to be apart your beautiful sweet understanding and kind a girl anyone would be lucky to find small town girl Hollywood pretty not even from my side of the city

It didn't take you long to be entwined in my life and I wouldn't want it any other way when it comes to you I can't keep my feelings at Bay
...

Cleaning the mess that is my life the broken pieces of toys like memories haunting me.
my addiction is trying to break me- constantly- reminding me of why I'm staying clean.
tears soaking the floor of the room I laid to lick my wounds of what their mother did to me.
Addiction is the silent enemy that never takes the blame back and forth between recovery and relapse but I don't want to play that game.
...

I made you a promise, you made me one too.
I told you I was serious, if you make it, you better be serious too.

I knew no matter what, if you were by my side, we would make it through.
...

I'm sick of being labeled an addict, junkie, meth head, or druggie.
I just want to be able to daddy.
I can't wait till this OCY bullshit is over...
I just want to see my Eli and J-Dozer.
...

Some People lead a life planning on going to heaven or hell...
they base their actions and decisions on which side of the rapture they wanna end up in.
I've been beaten down so badly I've become manipulative and crafty.
you'll never be able to read me exactly so let me inform you
...

When Mommy left it broke daddy's heart
Now just getting out of bed is a struggle because I'm so
depressed
I feel like I never have enough rest
...

Babe you are amazing, the biggest part of my life.
I'm proud to say that one day…
One day we will be Husband & Wife!
Just thinking about the concept… It brings tears of joy.
...