Why Poem by Julie Neises

Why can't I just move on?
He never really loved me.

And all this time,
I was deaf and blind.
Feeding on feelings.
So high....

How could God set someone up to fail?
Is this a cruel joke?
I wish I would run outta air,
gasp, turn purple, choke.

I know that no one could understand,
no one else was there.
Only him to hear my cries,
should I have even shed a tear?

The only person in whom I can confide,
ignores my plea for help.
No matter how much he means to me,
I cry, scream... yelp.

I reach out in the darkness,
to find that no one's there.
I can still feel his sweat,
hear his voice, smell his hair.

Why?