Why Me Poem by Preston Mwiinga

Why Me



I am 10 years old, I go to the same school as your child in Marapodi. Your child goes home to rest; I go home to hide from my grandfather because he likes to have ‘special time' with me alone whilst grandma plays with the other kids.😥

I am 16 years of age; I attend high school with your daughter in Mongu. At night while she's studying I'm in my room self harming because it's the only way I can get through my step fathering sexually abusing me whilst my mum is at work.😰

I am 17 years old; you see me hanging out at Lumumba bus station and you give me dirty looks when you walk past me. I wonder if you'd give my Papa those looks at church if you knew what he was doing to me.😭

I am 16 years old; I just terminated my child. Although he's not my real father he has raised me as if he was; but then real fathers don't have sex with their daughters. My mum believes me but why is it that my Samoan aunties, uncles and grandparents don't. "Village kids are spoilt they say".....
😐

I am 9 years old; I'm the naughty kid, I'm the ‘attention seeker'..... I wish they had of realised that my cries weren't for attention they were because my uncle was making his way into my room at night and forcing himself upon me. Your daughter and I play netball at Matero Girls together.

I am just 4 years old.You trust him because he's one of the family elders. He is titled; he goes to church and is a family man. He will continue to sexually violate me for many years because you will not know what signs to look for. You won't be suspicious and if by chance you see something you'll probably dismiss it because it will be too hard for you to handle. Each year that he continues to abuse me I will lose more of myself. I will be in pain, I will be in agony. I will never learn how to trust and I will think that grown men making sexual advances towards little girls is ‘normal'. I might eventually fall pregnant to him, or I'll catch a sexually transmitted infection thats if depression or addiction don't take over my life.

Yep,4 years old and because he made a choice to sexually violate me and he continues to get away with it I continue to suffer. I am 4 years old; just like your daughter, your niece, your grandchild...

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