You Live In My Heart Forever Poem by Vishnu Vidyadharan

At times of joy
At times to merry
I’ve been acting so happy
I can’t believe how fake I was.
Faking my laughter
Faking my smile
Hiding the truth behind the mask
while my heart was breaking into pieces
with every happy emotions that I gave.
My heart is burning, it feels so heavy
Desires are no longer there.
I’m all cracked up, left alone with empty emotions

I woke up, strong like never before.
I fought wars with the shadows
the shadows of cruel times, with
the shadows of hard emotions and
shadows of everything that I wished
to discard from my life. I never
thought I would lose, but
finally at the end of the day
that was what had happened.
I tried to fool myself hiding
behind my dreams, I tried to make
everything as simple as it seemed.
But I kept losing the battle
No matter how hard I seem to try
I always failed. I’ve certainly fallen
into an unknown place, where darkness
spills me with solitude and space.

The sorrow in my morning heart
The shutter of my weakened body
The burning in my tearful eyes
The longing of a hug in my empty arms
I can feel my heart slowly fade,
I can feel my depression grown strong
But never ceasing to rest, never ceasing to smile.
Even when I am surrounded by people
I’m hurting myself on the inside.
Even when my eyes are dry
My mind never relaxed
and… I …
…. Ended up…
… Holding this Red Pot of my Mother’s Ashes.
I wish if she could revive and rise again
from these Ashes and call me again…!

The last dropp of tear fall down my cheeks
Standing under a flawless blue sky
and washed by the streaming water…
I set this pot to the rhythm of those waves…!
Good bye MOM…!
That’s all I could say…



-dedicated to my friend’s MOM who
left us all from this beautiful land on
18th October 2007.
May her soul rest in peace.