Psychotic Rose

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The Voices In My Head

06~06~2019

Sometimes I look into my mental mirror
And wonder what they all see
People find beauty in this image
And I feel like it's said to a version of me I don't know.

The sudden feel of being unattractive
Yet there's still someone out there
Whose time pauses and it's as though
They see an angel when I walk by

Deep down I don't feel it
Nor do I see it
Is it because I see beyond the smile
I'm inside the head
Where it all goes down
The criticism, emotion breaks and wraths

Look at myself with utter disgust
Like I just saw the nastiest creation.
A lump in my throat as I hold back the tears
That threaten to depart from my eyes

Yet again I'm in that space
I think I should stop spending time alone
There's too much that happens there
In the silence of my realistic appearance
There's a lot of words in my silence
Like there is a silent rock band inside

Thoughts giving me a headache
Like I'd banged my head against a wall
Knocked down emotionally
Like the night creeps in with secrets
And the silence is more of a scream
Like screams of those in danger

They all in my head, two pieces in one day
No one would ever say they understand
What happens inside here
We all have our own voices that we long to shut up
But they never seem to die down

Instead they keep multiplying
As though they invite their friends over
Like they found a comfortable home
Take my brain and put it aside
Maybe then this hollow vessel will rest

All that's left would be to Crack the vase
But it stays strong with its patches
And still motivates other vases around it.

Psychotic_Rose 🌹

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