Randy Johnson Poems

I bought my rotten stepson a Nintendo Wii.
But then the jerk also wanted me to buy him a Playstation 3.
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I have this noose around my neck because I stole a horse.
After you hang me, you won't even feel remorse.
You asked if I have anything to say so I'm saying it.
This is an evil law and you're evil for obeying it.
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I feel remorse because my friend did something that wasn't right.
He was running late one day so he didn't stop at the traffic lights.
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I'm going to tell you something that is true.
Help your fellow man and God will bless you.
Give money to the homeless or to kids in 3rd world countries.
Help your fellow man today and the Lord will be pleased.
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(Dedicated to Burkette Greene who passed away February 7,1998.)


He cherished everyday of his life.
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My uncle is angry and severely depressed.
He no longer shaves and now he has breasts.
When he went to the hospital, they accidentally gave him a sex change.
Now his family looks at him like he's strange.
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Jesus was the greatest hero who ever lived.
He had the power of resurrection and the power to forgive.
When Jesus was tortured to death, he died for our sins.
We wish he was still here so that he could resurrect our kin.
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You like to show off those twenty one hundred dollar bills in your wallet.
You believe that it will impress people but insanity is what I call it.
After seeing your money, someone may clobber you and take it.
When you get an urge to flash your cash, please forsake it.
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I've been beaten up, cussed out and even threatened with guns.
All of this started happening when people learned that I'm Ted Bundy's son.
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