Stella Andrews Poems

Down this dusty dry track,
There is a boy waiting for me.
He has a smile that every girl wants,
And owns all the land your eyes can see.
...

..xX+I want to be your princess and hero+Xx..
..xX+I want to be you diary you tell your deepest thoughts too+Xx..
..xX+I want to be the teddy bear you trust will never tell your secrets+Xx..
..xX+I want to be the radio you listen to+Xx..
...

I really like Myself. We seem to share the same interests in nearly everything. We dress the same, like the same music, movies, activities and so much more. We sit together at the table with a Milo and read the junk mail and newspaper or watch tv. She hates the wind when it's raining and even more despises cruelty being spread into our world like the black toxic smoke you see lurking out of old trucks. She's forever sweet and caring and holds me when I'm down. She listens to me even when I'm speaking nonsense and won't ever leave me until I'm smiling again.
She's smarter than I am. She has the ability to see things as they are, instead of seeing through rose coloured glasses like me. She somehow keeps her emotions and decision making sections of her brain very separate. I don't know how, but I admire it.

I lost her for a long time because I refused to listen to her at the edge of a storm. She told me this was only going to bring disaster but I was so restless back then and I was curious to see what it's like inside. She begged and begged me to stay, but I wouldn't listen. I turned my back on her and dived headfirst into the dark, consuming storm.
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i try to understand,
whats going through my head.
i try to say it out loud,
but it doesn't come out.
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why do i take this life for granted?
how can i when i know how closely
life and death joined.
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dear god,
please help me to remember this throughout the day,

I must not fear the unknown
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if i were a flower,
i would deserve to be a ugly weed,
eaten slowly by snails and bugs.
...

why is this like a snail beneath a foot?
why is it like a balloon freshly popped?
how is it possible, to have nothing,
with nothing taken?
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I want to feel the electricity from a lightening bolt.
I want to feel alive for if only a second.
I want to loose complete control over what i get from the bolt,
And i want to watch as the whole world would then darken.
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Sometimes i wonder if i was put on this earth for something more.
Something more than just a house wife that does the same as everyone else.
Something more than a parent in a dead end job going no where and living as someone, so unknown to the world.
...