VICTORIA GEORGE Poems

I bought a nice car-a-van
From a seller who was on e-Bay
He seemed a very nice man
So I was happy to take it away
...

I bid on a beautiful ring
With a very hefty price tag
But got outbid on this thing
So I bid on a Prada hand-bag
...

Housework’s such a waste of time
Cleaning all that filth and grime
You scrape and wipe the filthy glass
You shine and polish all the brass
...

Multi task’s a thing for gals
It’s not a thing for males
We can talk to all our pals
While painting finger nails
...

One day Pooh Bear said to Tigger
Why don’t we open an account on eBay?
Our funds will soon get much bigger
And we’ll have hunney to eat every day
...

I decided to buy some cheap flights
From a cheap on-line travel shop
I wanted to see all the sights
In Bangladesh and in Bangkok
...

I opened an eBay address
In my dog’s name, smellyoldbess
She sold quite a lot - of tatty old grot
To buyers who want something for less.
...

I was reading the paper today
A bit about home remed-ies
I’d make some to sell on e-Bay
After all, how hard could it be?
...

I once wrote to a literary agent
Saying I wrote some good po-et-ry
I said I wanted his comment
Could his give his advice for this free?
...

This 'poem' is actually totally and completely true and really happened to me a few years ago. I still laugh just thinking about it. Wicked really.

I once bought a load of LPs
That I saw ad-vert-ised on eBay
...