2010/12/10 Unleash My Ardslignish Poem by Margaret Alice

The clouds form a map of the UK in the sky
then morphs into a white Troglodyte, but due
to an aberration in cloud formation and my
fixation on all things English, I find another
map of England up high in the shining white
which also morphs into a white Troglodyte,
clearly a regular pattern in Cumulus cloud

Again I wondered why all radio stations play
horrible electric music without resonance, the
piped voice of an alien being singing hallo-o-o
-oh over and over while the electric keyboard
repeats the same rhythmic pattern, the only
word to describe this tinny sound is Ardentinny
and my reaction of lightning destruction of brain
cells can only be called Ardslignish

With hubby driving, I must endure this Araglin of
hellish sounds so he can be happy and content
while complaining endlessly about errant drivers
not making way as he makes his imperial approach,
I never use expletives like he does, I store my anger
while listening how drivers incur his wrath

When I take the wheel I unleash my Ardslignish on my
fellow road-hogs while singing happily at the top of my
voice, no Ardentinny unleashing Araglin for me, I sing
with the Beach Boys and croon with Elvis Presley…


Ardslignish, Ardentinny and Araglin: See “The Meaning of Liff”
by Douglas Adams, I have taken some liberty with his
dictionary, pp.6+7.