A Proper Apology Poem by O T

(Parker is standing outside of Finley's door. They are psyching themselves up, brushing off their clothes and taking a deep breath before finally knocking. There is a pause as the door opens.)

(Gentle) Hey- (the door begins to close. Desperately :) Wait! Wait, please. I'm here to apologize. (The door opens slowly) I'm sorry. I know now that what I did was- and still is- completely wrong. I accused you of cheating when you didn't and that was... wrong. After everything that happened with... Reagan, I've been overly paranoid of everyone I've been in a relationship with, no matter who they are, and it always ends the same way and- (calms down. Getting back on track :) I'm sorry. You didn't deserve it. I was wrong because you never gave me any real signs that you were cheating, and I jumped to conclusions based on nothing but my own experiences when you are a completely different person. I let my past experiences leak into the present and I shouldn't have.

I know now that what I did was undeserved, and I can imagine that being accused for something you didn't do can make you feel… not. Good. If someone accused me of doing something I didn't, I know that I wouldn't feel good either. You probably feel betrayed, a-and attacked, and... upset. And all of those feelings are completely valid, and nothing I say can change that. (reciting knowledge) You are justified in feeling those things and I would never try to downplay them for the sake of my own feelings. In a way, I did betray you and your feelings, and I take full responsibility for that. Nothing I did was in any way your fault, and… and I never want to be responsible for you feeling those things ever again.

That's why I've actually, um… I've started… going to therapy. To start working past my trust issues and paranoia and… all that. I know now that I hurt you because I was so... insecure in myself and insecure in our relationship that I became scared that you thought those things about me as well and that you wouldn't want to stay with me. Because I started taking therapy, though, I know ways to… cope. And to reassure myself. I'm hoping that therapy will finally help me move forward and help me to never start spiraling like that again. I am committed to being better now and I promise that nothing like this will ever happen again.

I'm not asking to get back together. I just want to help you move forward or… move on, and getting a proper apology is, as my therapist says, the first step in the healing process. So… yeah. That's all. (starts leaving) I-I can leave now, and- (interrupted. Stops) sorry? You don't… (understanding. sad) oh. Okay. No, I- I understand. I appreciate you saying that. I'll… go. Just know that I'm- (door shuts) Oh. Ok.